I got let go.
Those are the hardest words I have ever had to say, and I had to say them over and over again to every contact I reached out to and every interview I went on. It still feels like nails on a chalkboard. I have always been one of the hardest working people I know. I get up early and work late. I took calls regarding random questions on maternity leave. I did everything I could to salvage accounts that were already sinking when they were handed to me. I’m one of the most organized people I know. I’m efficient. I care so much and I’m so damn nice to everyone I work with and yet… I got let go.
When I was told that I was getting let go I had to take a few minutes to really wrap my head around what that meant. I shook my head and nodded and said “I totally get it”, “no hard feelings”. I apologized that it was hard on them to have to let me go.
The executive team got together and consciously made decisions about who they wanted to keep on their team and who they didn’t. They wrote my name on a whiteboard and then they erased it. Of all the people within the company, they decided that they didn’t want me on their team. My skill set was replaceable. I was just a number in their business model.
Then “nice Amanda” slowly faded into the distance. While I was upset, I was very pissed. My blood was boiling.
If I had been a few years younger I might have gone on Glassdoor and written a shitty review. But I was older, and I knew better.
I needed to prove to the company and to myself that I could land a killer gig. I reached out to every single person I had ever met that might have a lead or just be willing to talk to me about ideas and opportunities. I made calls, texts, and emails. I reached out to recruiters and friends and former clients from years past.
I’m not sharing this because I want any pity for losing my job, I’m sharing this because it happens all the time. You must understand that you are working for a company that has a financial goal. Keeping your job is not guaranteed. In the business world, nothing is guaranteed.
Failure doesn’t mean an end. It means a new beginning. An opportunity to re-evaluate your situation. To try something new. To go bigger. To be more.
It also means you get a chance to prove that they should have kept you on their team.
As I write this, I am crossing the 10,000-word mark in my first book. Without getting let go, I wouldn’t even have started writing. I have also landed a killer gig at a major CPG company doing something that I absolutely love and have a team of people that value my skills and come to me for ideas and advice.
I got let go from a job that wasn’t right for me and I’m proud of that.